The Eye Behind The Wall (1977)

Dir: Giuliano Petrelli

Oddball rare giallo in which a wheelchair-bound man (Fernando Rey) and his partner (Olga Bisera) get more than they bargained for when they start spying on their introverted tenant (John Phillip Law). It's a little bit "Rear Window" and I'm a sucker for that kind of story but "Eye Behind The Wall" takes matters way further down the spiral of morbid sexuality. Every character has some kind of massive perversion and this makes for a fascinatingly sordid story once the whole grim affair has unfolded. There's a creepy atmosphere throughout and a nice twist, but the script's structure is awkward, badly paced and overladen with dead end subplots that go nowhere. At times, its darkness feels a lot like some kind of cry for help from writer/director Petrelli (who's never made another film or been heard from again). He's clearly trying to make a more serious film than perhaps he was asked to. Sadly, his sombre dialogue jars with things like the hilarious naked disco scene and further adds to the film's imbalance. There's real talent and passion here, certainly, but it's a shame Petrelli was never able to develop it further and fulfil the promises hinted at in this flawed effort. **1/2

A Black Veil For Lisa (1968)

Dir: Massimo Dallamano

Sir John Mills heads the cast in this early giallo that sees him as a police officer on the trail of a serial killer. This time, our black-gloved, leather-clad friend is bumping off people involved in drug trafficking but poor old Mills is rather too preoccupied to nail the perp. Instead, he's busy worrying if his glamorous, much younger wife (a former drug user herself but surely that couldn't be relevant?!) is cheating on him with half the men in town while he's out working... "A Black Veil For Lisa" straddles the line between the classic film noir model and the then-burgeoning giallo but falls slightly more on the noir side with its hat-n-raincoat-wearing dick, fur-lined femme fatale (Bond girl Luciana Paluzzi) and seedy side-cast of squint-eyed lowlives. It also reveals the killer's identity quite early, abandoning the "whodunnit?" aspect in favour of twisting the character-driven melodramatic sub-plot in a few nice, unexpected directions. Like many of Dallamano's films, this is a tragic morality tale at heart but a gloriously pulpy one, loaded with gritty violence, wonderful tough-talkin' and a masterful lead performance from Mills who brings a pitiable sense of pathos to his hard-boiled character. ***

Etoile (1989)

Dir: Peter Del Monte

Extremely bizarre Italian fairytale/thriller from the 80s stars Jennifer Connelly as a ballet student who flies to an unspecified European city (Budapest? Rome? Vienna? Seems to be a little of all three) to audition for some kind of Suspiria-esque school that has "get the fuck out!" written all over it. Things get weird when she becomes possessed by a long-dead ballerina, stalked by a creepy old guy (well, two creepy old guys if you include horribly miscast "handsome" lead Gary McCleery) and forced to perform in some sort of ghost version of "Swan Lake". There are some incredible ideas in "Etoile", it is filmed beautifully and the ballet backdrop is always one I appreciate in a horror film, but it's way too muddled, unstructured and incomprehensible to work. There are several annoying dead end subplots (including one with a manic, screaming Charles Durning buying and selling clocks for no discernible reason) and Connelly and McCleery's total lack of onscreen chemistry kill their scenes together but it's actually worth sitting through all the nonsense just for the truly insane final reel. I don't want to give away the twist but it's one of the most glorious "WTF!?" moments I can remember. Not a great film but wow, what an ending. For an idea as batshit outlandish as that, I'm willing to forgive a multitude of sins! **

Near Dark (1986)

Dir: Katheryn Bigelow

I watched this by accident on TV when I was about 14, absolutely loved it and somehow never saw it again despite it being a "major" big budget movie that's been readily available on all formats throughout my lifetime. I think part of me was afraid that, as an adult, I'd watch it and the magic of that one intense, late-night viewing would somehow be ruined. But no. "Near Dark" is still as fantastic as it ever was. Part modern-day western, part outlaw road movie, part vampire romance; Adrian Pasdar plays a straw-chewin' horse-ridin' goober who takes home a beautiful girl and gets more than he bargained for. After being bitten and turned into a creature of the night, he's forced to hit the trails with her fucked-up vampire "family" (led by a never-more-menacing Lance Henriksen), where he must either adjust to their lifestyle of nightly mass murder or die. There are one or two minor elements of "Near Dark" that are a little corny I suppose - and the flashy (though admittedly breathtaking) action sequences as every bit as OTT as you'd expect from the director of "Point Break" - but there's just something about it that gets under the skin and stays there. The script is a pitch-perfect combination of contemporary edginess and classic Hollywood. You can feel the dusty heat of the southern settings and almost taste the darkness at times. The characterisation is wonderful (there could've been an extra hour of just talking and it still wouldn't feel too long) and the infamous barroom massacre scene is still one of the most shocking ten minutes of horror cinema I can think of. A genuinely great horror film. ****

Four Flies On Grey Velvet (1971)

Dir: Dario Argento

An abstract giallo from Argento's halcyon days that doesn't work as well as it should do. I appreciate that he was experimenting with the form he helped create and the artistry (and indeed audacity) of some the setpiece scenes here is breathtaking but the film's tone is too uneven. On one hand, it's a straight mystery story with a jazz drummer becoming embroiled in a web of blackmail and mass murder when he accidentally stabs a stranger who's been following him. On the other, it's a surreal black comedy, loaded with oddball red herrings, like Bud Spencer as "God" and Jean-Pierre Marielle's camp detective who spouts offbeat dialogue and flirts outrageously. It's also an utterly illogical, almost plotless film of images; an excuse for Argento to indulge his arthouse leanings. While any of these three elements could work alone, they clash badly and fight against each other. The messy result is interesting if you're an Argento scholar and it's always a pleasure to see Mimsy Farmer on the screen, but this is actually quite a dull film to watch. Yes. Even with Mimsy, it's flimsy. Sorry. Couldn't resist. *1/2

Black Magic Rites (1974)

Dir: Renato Polselli

(aka The Reincarnation of Isabel)

I'm not even sure where to begin with trying to explain this. There's a witch/vampire called Isabella who gets burnt at the stake in some nebulous past where everyone wears funny hats. 500 years later, a cult of old dudes in red morphsuits try to ressurect her by killing naked virgins in a castle. Maybe? It's hard to tell because half of the actors play multiple roles and, thanks to fit-inducing editing, no shot lasts for more than a second or two. There's constant fire, psychedelic lighting, whips, chains and abundant nudity from some pretty ladies, yet somehow the total lack of coherence and technical ineptitude makes this near-unwatchable. The denouement includes 3-way sex with a podgy vampire who can't stop blinking, two naked girls prodded by pensioners with sticks for what seems like forever, a hunchbacked Donald Pleasance lookalike thrown into a snake pit with only two snakes in it, and a peculiar vision of Hell that's all red lycra and girls chained to stepladders. This film was lost for decades and, watching it now, it's not hard to see why. It is like staring directly into the mind of a complete lunatic. EL BOMBA!

Pulse (2006)

Dir: Jim Sonzero

I like the idea. I really do. Telecommunications experiments involving super long wave frequencies end up channeling the dead. The angry dead at that. Before long, said dead are coming through modems, cellphones, wi-fi, you name it. Anything that has a network seems to release screaming, flickering static ghosties faster than you say "'Ring' was eight years ago! these FX are passé!" and it's down to a group of nondescript, apathetic teens to save the world. Sadly, this hip retelling of Kiyoshi Kurosawa's "Kairo" fails for several reasons. Firstly, the screenplay (co-penned by a sheepish Wes Craven) is seriously clumsy and filled with holes you could push André The Giant through; the characters never come to life, the story doesn't get going until about 15 minutes before the end and there are way too many confusing, inconsequential scenes that bog it down and go nowhere. Secondly, the style/direction is atrocious. Imagine being locked in a room for ten years watching nothing but TV commercials and Metallica videos circa 1991 and "Pulse" would be the resultant nightmares you'd have. Filters, post-production trickery, bad CGI, shakycam handheld shots and more gratuitous Kristen Bell costume changes than you can shake a halter top at. A damn shame because with some tightening up, a little directorial restraint, and a few more of the fleeting creepy moments, this could've been a contender. *1/2

The Shout (1978)

Dir: Jerzy Skolimowski

And now for something completely different! A bizarre and underrated nerve-shredder set in the isolated depths of North Devon. A married couple (John Hurt and Susannah York) let a black-clad stranger (Alan Bates) into their home who claims to have learned aboriginal magic after spending eighteen years in the Australian outback. This includes the ability to perform a 'terror shout' that can (allegedly) kill its intended victim instantly. The storyline is bizarre, complex and told with unconventional chronology which makes the film a little difficult to fully interpret on first viewing - indeed, it's still debatable what the ambiguous conclusion really means - yet despite this, "The Shout" remains a genuinely nightmarish experience. The direction is pitch-perfect with breathtaking use of sound, the acting is faultless (especially Bates, who's hypnotising in the lead) and the atmosphere is as creepy as almost anything else I can think of. Not for everyone perhaps, but a unique example of mature, intelligent and low-key horror at its weirdest. ***1/2