"Demons" may not make perfect sense, I'll warn you. A group of people get trapped in a cinema that's playing a B-Movie about the apocalyptic prophecies of Nostradamus. There's a mask in both the movie and the foyer of the cinema that turns its wearers into demons and, before you know it, bug-eyed monsters dribbling green goo are running rampant and ripping the cinemagoers limb from limb. The place itself is kind of Escher-esque in its baffling, ever-changing layout. Time and space bends way beyond reality and the climactic scenes are absolutely bonkers but I just don't care. I can't think of any other film that celebrates excess in such an exhilarating manner. The pace never lets up - it's a non-stop parade of phenomenal gore effects, bucketloads of fluids I can't even begin to identify, weird-ass creatures, eye-popping red and blue lighting, blistering heavy metal and absurdly OTT action heroics. No matter how many times I watch it, I still find myself cheering, whooping and laughing along. My pulse quickens, I lose my breath, I get all weak at the knees from the excitement. Admittedly part of this could be the rare appearance of a grown-up and suddenly breathtaking Nicoletta Elmi but mostly it's just that "Demons" is the ultimate, no-nonsense distillation of everything that makes horror movies so thrilling and fun. Who knows? Maybe it's too daft for modern audiences. Maybe you had to be there but this is what I grew up on and, for me, it hasn't aged a day. Perfecto! ****
Showing posts with label Splatter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Splatter. Show all posts
Saturday, 28 April 2012
Sunday, 25 March 2012
Contamination (1980)
Dir: Luigi Cozzi
This lovably goofy sci-fi/horror crossover starts with a bunch of alien eggs finding themselves transported from Mars into New York on a mysterious abandoned boat. Sounds boring but it turns out - and get this! - that if you get any goo from the eggs on yourself, YOU EXPLODE. Yeah. EXPLODE. Like, totally. From the guts out. IN SLOW MOTION, no less. A tough talking army colonel, an alcoholic astronaut and a wise-cracking cop try to save the world from the explodey eggs but the odds are stacked against them as more and more keep appearing... IN THE UNLIKELIEST OF PLACES! In many respects, Contamination is unashamedly B-Grade, taking its cues from the schlockiest of 50s drive-in classics and loading itself with corny dialogue and cheap laughs. In others, however, it's surprisingly polished. There are some really slick sequences, a lot of cool location shooting and some decent (and very splattery) special FX. There's a budget here and it's put to impeccable use. It's the kind of film that could never be made now; if anything, it's maybe the only true posthumous postscript of drive-in chic. A loving full stop at the end of an era. Whatever else though, "Contamination" is a blast. Endlessly entertaining. ***
This lovably goofy sci-fi/horror crossover starts with a bunch of alien eggs finding themselves transported from Mars into New York on a mysterious abandoned boat. Sounds boring but it turns out - and get this! - that if you get any goo from the eggs on yourself, YOU EXPLODE. Yeah. EXPLODE. Like, totally. From the guts out. IN SLOW MOTION, no less. A tough talking army colonel, an alcoholic astronaut and a wise-cracking cop try to save the world from the explodey eggs but the odds are stacked against them as more and more keep appearing... IN THE UNLIKELIEST OF PLACES! In many respects, Contamination is unashamedly B-Grade, taking its cues from the schlockiest of 50s drive-in classics and loading itself with corny dialogue and cheap laughs. In others, however, it's surprisingly polished. There are some really slick sequences, a lot of cool location shooting and some decent (and very splattery) special FX. There's a budget here and it's put to impeccable use. It's the kind of film that could never be made now; if anything, it's maybe the only true posthumous postscript of drive-in chic. A loving full stop at the end of an era. Whatever else though, "Contamination" is a blast. Endlessly entertaining. ***
Sunday, 8 January 2012
Buio Omega (1980)
Dir: Joe D'amato
(aka Beyond The Darkness, The Final Darkness, Buried Alive)
Millionaire playboy Frank (an unforgettable turn by Kieran Kanter) is consumed by grief and decides to keep his beautiful girlfriend (Cinzia Monreale) around after she dies. He steals her corpse, embalms it and keeps it in bed with him at his isolated villa, convinced that nothing could possibly go wrong with this plan... and how could it, right? "Buio Omega" is a wild original. A film so unutterably barmy that it plays almost like an extreme Horace Walpole novel, blending high camp soap plotting and gothic melodrama with genuinely disgusting, graphic gore and sex. It's hard to take the latter elements seriously when the story hits its most absurd highs and yet still somehow the combination of gorgeous location photography, a fantastic Goblin score (one of their best ever) and the sheer grimness of the ideas leaves an unsettling feeling behind. It's illogical, uneven and ludicrous but you'll never see another film like it and for that it's kind of brilliant. ***1/2
(aka Beyond The Darkness, The Final Darkness, Buried Alive)
Millionaire playboy Frank (an unforgettable turn by Kieran Kanter) is consumed by grief and decides to keep his beautiful girlfriend (Cinzia Monreale) around after she dies. He steals her corpse, embalms it and keeps it in bed with him at his isolated villa, convinced that nothing could possibly go wrong with this plan... and how could it, right? "Buio Omega" is a wild original. A film so unutterably barmy that it plays almost like an extreme Horace Walpole novel, blending high camp soap plotting and gothic melodrama with genuinely disgusting, graphic gore and sex. It's hard to take the latter elements seriously when the story hits its most absurd highs and yet still somehow the combination of gorgeous location photography, a fantastic Goblin score (one of their best ever) and the sheer grimness of the ideas leaves an unsettling feeling behind. It's illogical, uneven and ludicrous but you'll never see another film like it and for that it's kind of brilliant. ***1/2
Saturday, 31 December 2011
Anthropophagus (1980)
Dir: Joe D'Amato
Even the makers admit to being a little embarrassed about this extremely dark exploitation flick but I'd have to argue its virtues with them. It may seem like standard fare as a crazed cannibal (played by the film's screenwriter, George Eastman!) stalks a group of hapless tourists around a remote Greek island, and it may be pretty gross and sleazy in parts (I mean, yeah, homeboy eats a foetus) but I think it's been done a disservice by those who regard it as just trash. Maybe it's time and nostalgia that have improved it but I actually think "Anthropophagus" is a damn fine, slow-burning slasher. The atmosphere is moody and although the gore doesn't really start in force until some 70+ minutes into the movie, there's a feeling of dread constructed perfectly by the cast, locations, photography and yes, even the script. It's pretty tight and the killer's back story is original and weird enough to work. The truly stunning Tisa Farrow stars as the terrified but headstrong heroine and her performance is emotional and greatly underrated. Even Eastman, as the killer, is seriously scary in his weird face make-up and bald wig, and the ending he writes for himself is as black as they come. Still shocking some 30 years on. ***1/2
Even the makers admit to being a little embarrassed about this extremely dark exploitation flick but I'd have to argue its virtues with them. It may seem like standard fare as a crazed cannibal (played by the film's screenwriter, George Eastman!) stalks a group of hapless tourists around a remote Greek island, and it may be pretty gross and sleazy in parts (I mean, yeah, homeboy eats a foetus) but I think it's been done a disservice by those who regard it as just trash. Maybe it's time and nostalgia that have improved it but I actually think "Anthropophagus" is a damn fine, slow-burning slasher. The atmosphere is moody and although the gore doesn't really start in force until some 70+ minutes into the movie, there's a feeling of dread constructed perfectly by the cast, locations, photography and yes, even the script. It's pretty tight and the killer's back story is original and weird enough to work. The truly stunning Tisa Farrow stars as the terrified but headstrong heroine and her performance is emotional and greatly underrated. Even Eastman, as the killer, is seriously scary in his weird face make-up and bald wig, and the ending he writes for himself is as black as they come. Still shocking some 30 years on. ***1/2
Thursday, 29 December 2011
Saint (2010)
Dir: Dick Maas
Super-stylish Dutch Christmas horror in which Saint Nicholas turns out to be a zombie bastard with an army of black orc slaves who kill indiscriminately, steal children and ship them off to Spain in giant flying ships. No, really. I'm not making this up. Worse still, this is loosely based on a real Dutch Christmas story. Still, in this film, it's up to the obligatory rebel teenager and an alcoholic cop-on-the-edge to save the day. There's not much in the way of surprises once you've digested the premise but the film's absolutely beautiful to look at, the prosthetic gore FX are squishy, plentiful and effective, and the monster designs are pretty cool. It can never quite decide how serious it wants to be (the rooftop horse chase scene is particularly hilarious) but I'd say go into this one for the yuks and you won't be disappointed. Definitely one of the better Christmas horrors. ***
Super-stylish Dutch Christmas horror in which Saint Nicholas turns out to be a zombie bastard with an army of black orc slaves who kill indiscriminately, steal children and ship them off to Spain in giant flying ships. No, really. I'm not making this up. Worse still, this is loosely based on a real Dutch Christmas story. Still, in this film, it's up to the obligatory rebel teenager and an alcoholic cop-on-the-edge to save the day. There's not much in the way of surprises once you've digested the premise but the film's absolutely beautiful to look at, the prosthetic gore FX are squishy, plentiful and effective, and the monster designs are pretty cool. It can never quite decide how serious it wants to be (the rooftop horse chase scene is particularly hilarious) but I'd say go into this one for the yuks and you won't be disappointed. Definitely one of the better Christmas horrors. ***
The Violent Kind (2010)
Dir: The Butcher Brothers
The Butcher Brothers have another crack at genre-hopping horror in a similar vein to their earlier effort, "The Hamiltons". Again, we're faced with a slightly lopsided family; in this case a group of bikers who go up to their isolated cabin in the woods for a party and wind up staying overnight when their engines stop working. This leads to, at first, a kind of "Sons of Anarchy" meets "The Evil Dead" type affair but soon takes a turn for the seriously weird. I won't spoil it because I quite enjoyed watching it unfold without having any idea what was going to happen and, for that, I've got to give them credit. Arguably, "The Violent Kind" bites off a little more than it can chew by throwing so many elements into the mix but the script and performances are all pretty strong and I do gives points for originality. **1/2
The Butcher Brothers have another crack at genre-hopping horror in a similar vein to their earlier effort, "The Hamiltons". Again, we're faced with a slightly lopsided family; in this case a group of bikers who go up to their isolated cabin in the woods for a party and wind up staying overnight when their engines stop working. This leads to, at first, a kind of "Sons of Anarchy" meets "The Evil Dead" type affair but soon takes a turn for the seriously weird. I won't spoil it because I quite enjoyed watching it unfold without having any idea what was going to happen and, for that, I've got to give them credit. Arguably, "The Violent Kind" bites off a little more than it can chew by throwing so many elements into the mix but the script and performances are all pretty strong and I do gives points for originality. **1/2
Sunday, 25 April 2010
Beyond Reanimator (2003)
Dir: Brian Yuzna
Lacklustre threequel that fails to live up to its predecessors. Jeffrey Combs is back as Herbert West but this time he's in prison. The clink doc, Howard Phillips (GROAN), enlists West to help in the clinic but his ulterior motive is to produce more of West's "re-agent", the secret formula that brings back the dead. Before long, zombies abound and the traditionally splattery mayhem ensues. Unfortunately, there's something missing. Although we get everything from twitching, rat-bothering severed penises to eyeballs running around of their own volition, the "shock and awe" of the first film's insane gore is missing. Instead, the mix of comedy and brutality just jars and feels somehow gross (in the bad way) and yet very, very dull. The fact that they use endlessly convoluted pseudo-science to justify what's basically a retread of the first two films just makes it all the more tedious. The prosthetic work by Screaming Mad George is technically excellent and Elsa Pataky is always a pleasure but otherwise, there's not much here. *1/2
Lacklustre threequel that fails to live up to its predecessors. Jeffrey Combs is back as Herbert West but this time he's in prison. The clink doc, Howard Phillips (GROAN), enlists West to help in the clinic but his ulterior motive is to produce more of West's "re-agent", the secret formula that brings back the dead. Before long, zombies abound and the traditionally splattery mayhem ensues. Unfortunately, there's something missing. Although we get everything from twitching, rat-bothering severed penises to eyeballs running around of their own volition, the "shock and awe" of the first film's insane gore is missing. Instead, the mix of comedy and brutality just jars and feels somehow gross (in the bad way) and yet very, very dull. The fact that they use endlessly convoluted pseudo-science to justify what's basically a retread of the first two films just makes it all the more tedious. The prosthetic work by Screaming Mad George is technically excellent and Elsa Pataky is always a pleasure but otherwise, there's not much here. *1/2
Wednesday, 7 April 2010
End of the Line (2007)
Dir: Maurice Devereaux
I wouldn't want to speak too soon having only seen two of his films but I'm fast becoming convinced that Canadian director Maurice Devereaux is one of the leading lights of the horror genre right now. "End of the Line" is wonderful. The twisty-turny plot concerns a group of travelers on a subway train, trapped underground with a crazed doomsday cult who believe the apocalypse is occurring above them. This skillfully uses conventions of survival horror while at the same time offering something new and exciting that's as creepy as it is gory. My one small complaint with the script is that the ending (although still unsettling) is given away far too early and I'd've probably had my mind completely blown beyond repair if I hadn't seen it coming. But this is a small price to pay for all the wonderful roving long takes, the finger-chewing tension, the chilling atmosphere, the unflinching gore and the above-average characterisation. I wish all indie horror was this inventive, disturbing and brilliant. Kinda reminds me of the buzz I got the first time I watched "The Descent". ***1/2
I wouldn't want to speak too soon having only seen two of his films but I'm fast becoming convinced that Canadian director Maurice Devereaux is one of the leading lights of the horror genre right now. "End of the Line" is wonderful. The twisty-turny plot concerns a group of travelers on a subway train, trapped underground with a crazed doomsday cult who believe the apocalypse is occurring above them. This skillfully uses conventions of survival horror while at the same time offering something new and exciting that's as creepy as it is gory. My one small complaint with the script is that the ending (although still unsettling) is given away far too early and I'd've probably had my mind completely blown beyond repair if I hadn't seen it coming. But this is a small price to pay for all the wonderful roving long takes, the finger-chewing tension, the chilling atmosphere, the unflinching gore and the above-average characterisation. I wish all indie horror was this inventive, disturbing and brilliant. Kinda reminds me of the buzz I got the first time I watched "The Descent". ***1/2
Friday, 2 April 2010
Killing Spree (1986)
Dir: Tim Ritter
Classic trash from the early age of the straight-to-video shocker. It's easy to take "Killing Spree" for granted nowadays since it spawned a legion of no-budget imitators that continue to pollute the shelves to this day but there's a charm to this that endures. The marvellously-named Asbestos Felt plays Tom Russo, a working stiff who snaps under the dual pressures of his dead-end job and his wife who appears to be screwing up to three handymen a day. Unfortunately for Tom, the victims of his titular spree are coming back to life faster than he can kill them... Splatter ensues. The film's got a fun DIY ethic and, considering the now-unimaginable constraints these guys were working under, it's amazing they made anything watchable at all, let alone something as entertaining as Killing Spree. While slow to start and roughly made at times, the cast is charismatic and it's hard to not get some joy from the outrageous dialogue ("You screw my wife, I screwdrive your head!" / "Take your pink faggot hat, you stupid country motherfucker!") or inventively gross-out gore FX. **1/2
Classic trash from the early age of the straight-to-video shocker. It's easy to take "Killing Spree" for granted nowadays since it spawned a legion of no-budget imitators that continue to pollute the shelves to this day but there's a charm to this that endures. The marvellously-named Asbestos Felt plays Tom Russo, a working stiff who snaps under the dual pressures of his dead-end job and his wife who appears to be screwing up to three handymen a day. Unfortunately for Tom, the victims of his titular spree are coming back to life faster than he can kill them... Splatter ensues. The film's got a fun DIY ethic and, considering the now-unimaginable constraints these guys were working under, it's amazing they made anything watchable at all, let alone something as entertaining as Killing Spree. While slow to start and roughly made at times, the cast is charismatic and it's hard to not get some joy from the outrageous dialogue ("You screw my wife, I screwdrive your head!" / "Take your pink faggot hat, you stupid country motherfucker!") or inventively gross-out gore FX. **1/2
Tuesday, 23 March 2010
Psychos in Love (1986)
Dir: Gorman Bechard
I first saw this on a bad quality VHS bootleg about fifteen years ago and, when I found out it was finally out on DVD, a part of me expected to be disappointed. I wasn't. One of the genuine gems of the early direct-to-video boom, "Psychos in Love" is a low-budget splatter comedy about a bartender and a manicurist who fall in love. The only problem is that they're both psychotic serial killers who murder people at random because they feel they can't fit in with society's "norms". The story is somehow tender, absurd, grotesque and hilarious all at the same time and it has depth far beyond the "bad jokes", near-constant nudity and copious bargain basement gore effects (although that's not to say all of that isn't enjoyable too!). The humour, if anything, seems very ahead of its time and it's well delivered by the two fantastic leads (Carmine Capobianco and Debi Thibeault). 24 years on and there's a lot of cheap and strange movies out there but none quite like this one. ***1/2
I first saw this on a bad quality VHS bootleg about fifteen years ago and, when I found out it was finally out on DVD, a part of me expected to be disappointed. I wasn't. One of the genuine gems of the early direct-to-video boom, "Psychos in Love" is a low-budget splatter comedy about a bartender and a manicurist who fall in love. The only problem is that they're both psychotic serial killers who murder people at random because they feel they can't fit in with society's "norms". The story is somehow tender, absurd, grotesque and hilarious all at the same time and it has depth far beyond the "bad jokes", near-constant nudity and copious bargain basement gore effects (although that's not to say all of that isn't enjoyable too!). The humour, if anything, seems very ahead of its time and it's well delivered by the two fantastic leads (Carmine Capobianco and Debi Thibeault). 24 years on and there's a lot of cheap and strange movies out there but none quite like this one. ***1/2
Sunday, 21 March 2010
Tokyo Gore Police (2008)
Dir: Yoshihiro Nishimura
Unbelievable Japanese cyberpunk fantasy set in a future where the cops have been privatised by the shoot-first-ask-questions-later Tokyo Police Corporation and mutants run wild. Having been disappointed by J-Horror in the past couple of years, I'd dismissed "Tokyo Gore Police" because it looked zany and ironic and like novelty junk but I couldn't've been more wrong. There is certainly a little comedy in there and the gore is way over the top (definitely more, pint-for-pint, than anything I've seen in over twenty years of watching these kind of films) but the film's angry politics and obsessive Cronenbergian body horror lend it a depth that makes it fly. As jaded as I am, I spent most of this open-mouthed thinking "I have never seen ANYTHING like this before" and for that I sing its highest praises. When amputees with samurai swords for arms and legs and oversized prosthetic penises that shoot bullets are two of the less sensational set-pieces, you know you're in for a treat. A modern masterpiece of surrealist genius that makes "Tetsuo: The Iron Man" look like "Tetsuo: The Nerf Kid". ****
Unbelievable Japanese cyberpunk fantasy set in a future where the cops have been privatised by the shoot-first-ask-questions-later Tokyo Police Corporation and mutants run wild. Having been disappointed by J-Horror in the past couple of years, I'd dismissed "Tokyo Gore Police" because it looked zany and ironic and like novelty junk but I couldn't've been more wrong. There is certainly a little comedy in there and the gore is way over the top (definitely more, pint-for-pint, than anything I've seen in over twenty years of watching these kind of films) but the film's angry politics and obsessive Cronenbergian body horror lend it a depth that makes it fly. As jaded as I am, I spent most of this open-mouthed thinking "I have never seen ANYTHING like this before" and for that I sing its highest praises. When amputees with samurai swords for arms and legs and oversized prosthetic penises that shoot bullets are two of the less sensational set-pieces, you know you're in for a treat. A modern masterpiece of surrealist genius that makes "Tetsuo: The Iron Man" look like "Tetsuo: The Nerf Kid". ****
Friday, 19 March 2010
Dance of the Dead (2008)
Dir: Gregg Bishop
A troupe of goons from the high school sci-fi society inadvertently unleash the undead on prom night. Townsfolk turn into walking wormfood quicker than you can say “they’re coming to get you, Barbara”, so it’s left to the nerds goons to save the prom, kick zombie ass and change from boys into men while they’re at it. This rapid-fire splatterfest blends surprisingly sharp John Hughes-style comedy with a phenomenal level of gore and action. There’s little that’s new or original about it (except perhaps the zombie dissection frogs from the science lab) but it’s a great example of how to stay simple yet effective. The zombies show up pretty much immediately and, from that point on, there’s barely even time to grab a beer or open a bag of chips until the next spine is yanked out, the next arm ripped off or the next brain eaten. “Dance of the Dead” is a riot. See it. ***1/2
A troupe of goons from the high school sci-fi society inadvertently unleash the undead on prom night. Townsfolk turn into walking wormfood quicker than you can say “they’re coming to get you, Barbara”, so it’s left to the nerds goons to save the prom, kick zombie ass and change from boys into men while they’re at it. This rapid-fire splatterfest blends surprisingly sharp John Hughes-style comedy with a phenomenal level of gore and action. There’s little that’s new or original about it (except perhaps the zombie dissection frogs from the science lab) but it’s a great example of how to stay simple yet effective. The zombies show up pretty much immediately and, from that point on, there’s barely even time to grab a beer or open a bag of chips until the next spine is yanked out, the next arm ripped off or the next brain eaten. “Dance of the Dead” is a riot. See it. ***1/2
Tuesday, 23 October 2007
Night of the Demons (1988)
Dir: Kevin S. Tenney
Delightfully unpretentious 80s fun in which the local goth throws a Halloween party in a haunted house. It all goes to Hell, quite literally, as the pretty teenage guests turn into rubber-faced ghouls, hungry for souls. The plot's nothing new but, cleverly, it uses clichés to its advantage, rather than just recycling them cynically. Everything, from the Scooby-Doo-like animation in the title sequence to Dennis Tenney's pipe organ score, just makes this feel like one big ol' midnight movie extravaganza; a love letter to the most absurd elements of the genre from its roots right up to the (then) present day. Gothic set designs straight of Corman's Poe movies collide with garish splatter and more tits than you can possibly ogle in one sitting. What really makes it special is the way it manages to combine high camp with one or two moments that are genuinely creepy/scary. A nice balance. One day there'll be a Kevin Tenney revival and he'll be up there where he belongs with the greats. ***1/2
Delightfully unpretentious 80s fun in which the local goth throws a Halloween party in a haunted house. It all goes to Hell, quite literally, as the pretty teenage guests turn into rubber-faced ghouls, hungry for souls. The plot's nothing new but, cleverly, it uses clichés to its advantage, rather than just recycling them cynically. Everything, from the Scooby-Doo-like animation in the title sequence to Dennis Tenney's pipe organ score, just makes this feel like one big ol' midnight movie extravaganza; a love letter to the most absurd elements of the genre from its roots right up to the (then) present day. Gothic set designs straight of Corman's Poe movies collide with garish splatter and more tits than you can possibly ogle in one sitting. What really makes it special is the way it manages to combine high camp with one or two moments that are genuinely creepy/scary. A nice balance. One day there'll be a Kevin Tenney revival and he'll be up there where he belongs with the greats. ***1/2
Friday, 1 June 2007
Society (1989)
Dir: Brian Yuzna
As directorial debuts go, Brian Yuzna (who's subsequently failed to direct anything of interest) made quite a splash with "Society". A gooey, slimy, multi-coloured splash that you'll find hard to wipe off. Billy Warlock plays a Beverly Hills teenager who finds he doesn't fit in with his schoolmates or his family. He feels they're excluding him from something and that they look down on him. His shrink tells him that he's being paranoid and it's just teenage angst but, as the film goes on, Billy realises that the secrets behind his affluent community are more nightmarish than he could've possibly imagined. Shocking, original and seriously fuckin' weird, "Society" certainly has the accolade of being a film unlike any other I've seen. It's a little dated at times perhaps and its social satire element is hardly world-shattering, but still ... that's one Hell of an ending. Screaming Mad George's sickening special FX still make me squirm. Happy 'shunting'! ***1/2
As directorial debuts go, Brian Yuzna (who's subsequently failed to direct anything of interest) made quite a splash with "Society". A gooey, slimy, multi-coloured splash that you'll find hard to wipe off. Billy Warlock plays a Beverly Hills teenager who finds he doesn't fit in with his schoolmates or his family. He feels they're excluding him from something and that they look down on him. His shrink tells him that he's being paranoid and it's just teenage angst but, as the film goes on, Billy realises that the secrets behind his affluent community are more nightmarish than he could've possibly imagined. Shocking, original and seriously fuckin' weird, "Society" certainly has the accolade of being a film unlike any other I've seen. It's a little dated at times perhaps and its social satire element is hardly world-shattering, but still ... that's one Hell of an ending. Screaming Mad George's sickening special FX still make me squirm. Happy 'shunting'! ***1/2
Thursday, 10 May 2007
Return of the Living Dead: Rave To The Grave (2005)
Dir: Ellory Elkayem
The surviving teens from "Necropolis" find themselves once more in the gooey grasp of a zombie outbreak. This time, opportunistic science geek Cody (Cory Hardrict) extracts some kind of trioxin essence from the ubiquitous zombie barrels and turns it (in pill form) to 'Z', a hip new designer drug that's sweeping the college campus. Sadly, a side-effect of taking 'Z' is that one soon develops a taste for human brains. This causes much fun at the Halloween rave party ... The script is a little bit flakey now and again, but everything else is solid. Nice visuals, strong direction, an enjoyable cast and wicked special FX. Whilst not as relentless as "Necropolis", "Rave To The Grave" is a much funnier film, with its tongue so far in its cheek, it's poking out the other side and licking the eyeball of the guy next to it. The gore here is outrageous; we get decapitation by electric guitar, drumsticks through the eyes and (best of all) bum-biting zombies attacking the posteriors of a cheerleader human pyramid. Win. ***
The surviving teens from "Necropolis" find themselves once more in the gooey grasp of a zombie outbreak. This time, opportunistic science geek Cody (Cory Hardrict) extracts some kind of trioxin essence from the ubiquitous zombie barrels and turns it (in pill form) to 'Z', a hip new designer drug that's sweeping the college campus. Sadly, a side-effect of taking 'Z' is that one soon develops a taste for human brains. This causes much fun at the Halloween rave party ... The script is a little bit flakey now and again, but everything else is solid. Nice visuals, strong direction, an enjoyable cast and wicked special FX. Whilst not as relentless as "Necropolis", "Rave To The Grave" is a much funnier film, with its tongue so far in its cheek, it's poking out the other side and licking the eyeball of the guy next to it. The gore here is outrageous; we get decapitation by electric guitar, drumsticks through the eyes and (best of all) bum-biting zombies attacking the posteriors of a cheerleader human pyramid. Win. ***
Return of the Living Dead: Necropolis (2005)
Dir: Ellory Elkayem
Unexpectedly superb masterclass in how to make a no-nonsense, hi-octane zombie flick comes from the director of "Eight-Legged Freaks". "Necropolis" sees the trioxin barrels from the first three films causing havoc once more as a shady pharmaceuticals company unleashes the zombie gas on all and sundry, in the name of world domination. A group of (surprisingly) likeable teens get caught in the splattery crossfire and have to save the day against the undead hordes. We get everything that's good here; bio-zombies with gatling gun arms, chewy bouncing brains, spraying headwounds galore, big tanks, children with flamethrowers and ubercute Aimee-lynn Chadwick running around in pigtails. It's fast-paced, often very funny and, at times, even a little tense. It's nice to see an old-fashioned, reasonable budget approach to zombies and this is the most fun I've had in front of a TV for awhile now. Dare I say, I even found myself screaming things like, "Stick 'im, Becky!" at the screen? ***1/2
Unexpectedly superb masterclass in how to make a no-nonsense, hi-octane zombie flick comes from the director of "Eight-Legged Freaks". "Necropolis" sees the trioxin barrels from the first three films causing havoc once more as a shady pharmaceuticals company unleashes the zombie gas on all and sundry, in the name of world domination. A group of (surprisingly) likeable teens get caught in the splattery crossfire and have to save the day against the undead hordes. We get everything that's good here; bio-zombies with gatling gun arms, chewy bouncing brains, spraying headwounds galore, big tanks, children with flamethrowers and ubercute Aimee-lynn Chadwick running around in pigtails. It's fast-paced, often very funny and, at times, even a little tense. It's nice to see an old-fashioned, reasonable budget approach to zombies and this is the most fun I've had in front of a TV for awhile now. Dare I say, I even found myself screaming things like, "Stick 'im, Becky!" at the screen? ***1/2
Saturday, 17 February 2007
Bleak Future (1997)
Dir: Brian S. O'Malley
Quirky no-budget 16mm effort that pits post-apocalyptic mutants against one another in a race against time! Slangman (Frank Kowal) is a dictionary-toting anti-hero who, with the help of a mute Scotsman and a quirky blonde actress, embarks on a quest to find 'the source' (this appears to be a compact disc - or possibly a library - I lost track). A number of others are searching for this too, including King Malice (a mutant with two faces, one that spits goo) and Doctor Obvious (a punk rock prophet who believes himself the smartest man in the world). It all culminates with a ton of fake gore and terrible puns. To be honest, as hard as it tries, "Bleak Future" is one ghastly, Godawful mess. There's some talent and enthusiasm here, but the best thing about the movie is, by far, the Pig Latin subtitles on the 2007 DVD release. If only the screenplay were anywhere near this funny! I'd like to think it's because director O'Malley has genuinely gotten funnier in the 10 year interim. Might have to watch another of his to fully conclude. *1/2
Quirky no-budget 16mm effort that pits post-apocalyptic mutants against one another in a race against time! Slangman (Frank Kowal) is a dictionary-toting anti-hero who, with the help of a mute Scotsman and a quirky blonde actress, embarks on a quest to find 'the source' (this appears to be a compact disc - or possibly a library - I lost track). A number of others are searching for this too, including King Malice (a mutant with two faces, one that spits goo) and Doctor Obvious (a punk rock prophet who believes himself the smartest man in the world). It all culminates with a ton of fake gore and terrible puns. To be honest, as hard as it tries, "Bleak Future" is one ghastly, Godawful mess. There's some talent and enthusiasm here, but the best thing about the movie is, by far, the Pig Latin subtitles on the 2007 DVD release. If only the screenplay were anywhere near this funny! I'd like to think it's because director O'Malley has genuinely gotten funnier in the 10 year interim. Might have to watch another of his to fully conclude. *1/2
Thursday, 28 December 2006
Punk Rock Holocaust (2004)
Dir: Doug Sakmann
It's the Vans Warped Tour 2003. Less Than Jake tell a story by the fireside about the worst band ever to play the tour. They were called Brutal Enigma and "they weren't even punk rock; they were industrial or synthpop or some shit". They got kicked off the tour and no one ever heard from them again. Now, a masked killer is picking off bands and fans en masse. Could there be a connection? Could there also somehow be an even more fiendish plot at hand, involving zombies, supernatural powers and Satan Himself (who may or may not be played by Lloyd Kaufman)? Indeed there could. I warn you now; this film is utterly mindless. It's made for about a dollar, horribly shot on video with hyperactive editing and a high level of stupidity. On the other hand, it's great fun if you like punk rock and splatter. Not only are there some gloriously inventive death scenes (the way in which Bowling For Soup meet their unfortunate end is a work of genius) and a relentless triple-figure body count (hardcore gore approxmiately every two minutes) but also a ton of killer tunes from the likes of Rancid and Tsunami Bomb, and sense of demented fun that feels entirely sincere. As if this wasn't enough, there's also a certain guilty pleasure in watching rubbish bands like Simple Plan and The Used die horribly. The moment in which Andrew WK gets electrocuted onstage is a Godsend that should've happened long ago. But yeah, "Punk Rock Holocaust" requires a lot of beer, your brain in a jar and a love of good obnoxious music to fully work, but what can I say? This is clearly my puerile idea of a fun time. ***
It's the Vans Warped Tour 2003. Less Than Jake tell a story by the fireside about the worst band ever to play the tour. They were called Brutal Enigma and "they weren't even punk rock; they were industrial or synthpop or some shit". They got kicked off the tour and no one ever heard from them again. Now, a masked killer is picking off bands and fans en masse. Could there be a connection? Could there also somehow be an even more fiendish plot at hand, involving zombies, supernatural powers and Satan Himself (who may or may not be played by Lloyd Kaufman)? Indeed there could. I warn you now; this film is utterly mindless. It's made for about a dollar, horribly shot on video with hyperactive editing and a high level of stupidity. On the other hand, it's great fun if you like punk rock and splatter. Not only are there some gloriously inventive death scenes (the way in which Bowling For Soup meet their unfortunate end is a work of genius) and a relentless triple-figure body count (hardcore gore approxmiately every two minutes) but also a ton of killer tunes from the likes of Rancid and Tsunami Bomb, and sense of demented fun that feels entirely sincere. As if this wasn't enough, there's also a certain guilty pleasure in watching rubbish bands like Simple Plan and The Used die horribly. The moment in which Andrew WK gets electrocuted onstage is a Godsend that should've happened long ago. But yeah, "Punk Rock Holocaust" requires a lot of beer, your brain in a jar and a love of good obnoxious music to fully work, but what can I say? This is clearly my puerile idea of a fun time. ***
Wednesday, 20 December 2006
Bloodrayne (2005)
Dir: Uwe Boll
This wildly lavish costume horror from the scrambled brain of Uwe Boll is allegedly set in 18th century Romania, although any historical or geographical accuracy is ignored with gleeful abandon. The story centres on Rayne (Kristanna Loken), a half-human/half-vampire girl who seeks vengeance upon her evil undead father (Ben Kingsley, who here resembles the Pilsbury dough boy playing a kung-fu Marquis de Sade). He, meanwhile, is after some kind of magical talisman (aren't they always?) and it all leads to one big ol' swordfight. Somehow, Boll got a budget for this nonsense. The screenplay is written by Guinevere Turner ("American Psycho", "The Notorious Betty Page"), although this doesn't stop it from being riddled with ludicrous, anachronistic trumpery. The cast is full of 'name' actors (Michelle Rodriguez, Billy Zane, Udo Kier; even Meat Loaf pops up to grope Romanian prostitutes and get his ear bitten off!) but they seem to deliver their lines on auto-pilot and often with incomprehensible accents that sound like Cockney market sellers with Downs Syndrome (a symptom of the faux-period dialogue perhaps?). In spite of all this, the film somehow managed to entertain me and I found it hard to truly dislike. It's fast-paced, full of nudity and cartoon gore by the bucketload, and it's completely without shame. It's a big colorful whirlwind of trash and it's rare nowadays to see such Z-Grade exploitation on a dangerously high budget. They even replay ALL the gore at the end in slo-mo for maximum exploitation points. As if this wasn't enough, they gave Boll regular Will Sanderson a mohawk, a horse and his own private army. This can only be a good thing. ***
This wildly lavish costume horror from the scrambled brain of Uwe Boll is allegedly set in 18th century Romania, although any historical or geographical accuracy is ignored with gleeful abandon. The story centres on Rayne (Kristanna Loken), a half-human/half-vampire girl who seeks vengeance upon her evil undead father (Ben Kingsley, who here resembles the Pilsbury dough boy playing a kung-fu Marquis de Sade). He, meanwhile, is after some kind of magical talisman (aren't they always?) and it all leads to one big ol' swordfight. Somehow, Boll got a budget for this nonsense. The screenplay is written by Guinevere Turner ("American Psycho", "The Notorious Betty Page"), although this doesn't stop it from being riddled with ludicrous, anachronistic trumpery. The cast is full of 'name' actors (Michelle Rodriguez, Billy Zane, Udo Kier; even Meat Loaf pops up to grope Romanian prostitutes and get his ear bitten off!) but they seem to deliver their lines on auto-pilot and often with incomprehensible accents that sound like Cockney market sellers with Downs Syndrome (a symptom of the faux-period dialogue perhaps?). In spite of all this, the film somehow managed to entertain me and I found it hard to truly dislike. It's fast-paced, full of nudity and cartoon gore by the bucketload, and it's completely without shame. It's a big colorful whirlwind of trash and it's rare nowadays to see such Z-Grade exploitation on a dangerously high budget. They even replay ALL the gore at the end in slo-mo for maximum exploitation points. As if this wasn't enough, they gave Boll regular Will Sanderson a mohawk, a horse and his own private army. This can only be a good thing. ***
Thursday, 7 December 2006
Accion Mutante (1993)
Dir: Alex de la Iglesia
An ultra-gory, futuristic black comedy from Spain about a terrorist organisation (Accion Mutante, or Mutant Action, in English) of freaks and cripples who wage all-out war on the rich and beautiful. They plan the high-profile kidnapping of a millionaire baker's daughter but it all screws up in the most original take on the age-old 'heist gone bad' storyline that I can remember. First-time director Iglesia (under the guiding hand of Pedro Almodóvar, no less) shoots with style and verve, punctuating his brain-melting script with some of the most eye-popping visual weirdness this side of Takashi Miike (yeah, that's right - your whole head's gonna blow!). As for the humour; imagine a meaner, darker and madder "League of Gentlemen" and you're in the right area. Throw in a sprinkling of vicious social satire, some fuck-off firearms and more pint-for-pint gore than you can shake a dismembered Peter Jackson fan at, and you're in for one Hell of a ride down the tunnel of lunacy. A genuine one-of-a-kind flick and, to really cap it off, the ending is, astonishingly, rather romantic. Deranged, beautiful brilliance and a rare flash of true genius at work. You'd be madder than its makers if you missed it. ****
An ultra-gory, futuristic black comedy from Spain about a terrorist organisation (Accion Mutante, or Mutant Action, in English) of freaks and cripples who wage all-out war on the rich and beautiful. They plan the high-profile kidnapping of a millionaire baker's daughter but it all screws up in the most original take on the age-old 'heist gone bad' storyline that I can remember. First-time director Iglesia (under the guiding hand of Pedro Almodóvar, no less) shoots with style and verve, punctuating his brain-melting script with some of the most eye-popping visual weirdness this side of Takashi Miike (yeah, that's right - your whole head's gonna blow!). As for the humour; imagine a meaner, darker and madder "League of Gentlemen" and you're in the right area. Throw in a sprinkling of vicious social satire, some fuck-off firearms and more pint-for-pint gore than you can shake a dismembered Peter Jackson fan at, and you're in for one Hell of a ride down the tunnel of lunacy. A genuine one-of-a-kind flick and, to really cap it off, the ending is, astonishingly, rather romantic. Deranged, beautiful brilliance and a rare flash of true genius at work. You'd be madder than its makers if you missed it. ****
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